Friday, March 19, 2010
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.
Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.
The waves beside them danced, but they
Out-did the sparkling leaves in glee;
A poet could not be but gay,
In such a jocund company!
I gazed—and gazed—but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:
For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.
~ "I Wandered Lonely As A Cloud" - William Wordsworth
Thursday, March 18, 2010
She told me of it being his birthday yesterday and how she ached from the loss. The inability to just wish him a happy birthday. I reminded her he wasn't worthy of her well wishes. That sometimes it's best that you don't have contact. That some people just can't be friends.
And then I stopped dead in my tracks, realizing this was good advice. For myself.
Twenty years ago, I was a somewhat naive, bright-eyed young girl getting married. I knew deep-down in my soul that this wasn't the right thing for either of us but we forged ahead, hoping for the best. And, of course, it didn't work out. And we wounded each other deeply. And we went on with our lives, licking our wounds in the shadows and covering them up with as much scar tissue as possible.
One year ago I was that same girl yet not so naive and definitely not as bright eyed. I'd given up, to a certain degree. And I chose to act inappropriately. To inflict pain and suffering on myself and others instead of facing the pain and suffering in my own life. But, in some wonderfully painful twist of fate, I was able to finally reclaim that bright-eyed young girl.
And yesterday I, too, was faced with the dull ache from that loss. That inability to say "hi, how ya doin', glad life is treating you well". But it was only when I was thrust backwards suddenly by a voice from my past that I was reminded just how important it is to cut ties with certain people. Whether good or bad, whether I was able to survive them or not, it's never worth it to revisit the past when the present is what I've spent my whole life fighting for.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
It's not love. It's not God. It's not fate, or luck, or karma. It's not complicated or esoteric, and you needn't sacrifice, plead, or pray to invoke it. It's the only rule that's ever existed, and it's the only one that will ever exist. No reality can exist in its absence. For its mere existence, you are. With its existence, the power, the light, and the way are revealed. It's your purpose to discover it, and it's your destiny to master it. It's the beginning, the middle, and the end. The Alpha and the Omega. The be-all and end-all of every wish, desire, and dream, and you are its keeper.
This caveat of all caveats is that absolutely nothing can be anything until it is first imagined. Thoughts become things, nothing else does. And so, it's the thoughts you choose from here on out that will become the things and events of your life, forevermore. It is written in stone. There's no other way. It's your ticket to anywhere you can dream of. Your passport to abundance, health, and friendships. The key to the palace of your wildest dreams.
Your thoughts, and your thoughts alone, will set you in motion. Your thoughts will yield the inspiration, creativity, and determination you need. Your thoughts will orchestrate the magic and inspire the Universe. Your thoughts will carry you to the finish line if you just keep thinking them. Never give up. Never waiver, doubt, or ask.
That you've even received this Note, that you're able to read it through, means you are so close. So extraordinarily close. The hardest work has been done. The wars have already been waged. The lessons have already been learned. The journey, now, is for home.
Ain't no Blarney,
The Universe never lets me down, that's for sure. The thing I know for sure now, that I didn't know in my thirties (and couldn't even contemplate in my twenties, for God's sake!), is that no matter what stumbles I have along the way - I always end up making the right choice for me. The things that seem to be bad decisions.....the "bad" boyfriends, bad haircuts, hasty words said in anger.....all of it....it was all the right choice. Because it landed me here.
And here is good. Really, really good.